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(no subject) [Jan. 17th, 2009|10:14 am]
Okay! In today's episode of The Natural World Is Not What They Told You- snowflakes! The snowflakes near where you live probably look lik diamond-studded  doilies. Around here, they look like chunks of ice.
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(no subject) [Jan. 16th, 2009|09:33 pm]
Right! I've managed to read your comments, but not to reply. So I will just thank you all.
I'm rediscovering science. (Doesn't that sound fancy?) I got a microscope for Christmas, and I've been inspecting bits of my life under it. Sugar looks like an asteroid belt, and a strand of my hair looks like a cactus. Rose petals, it turns out, are pixelated. I've got a bunch of sunset colored roses here, and it turns out that some of the cells are bright yellow, and some of them are bright red. I thought they'd shade gradually, but no.

I wanted a microscope, because I wanted to look at creepy weird things with lots of legs-roasted furs being propelled around by wheel shaped protrusions, things like that. (roasted furs is actually not what I mean. But it's what Dragon thinks I mean, so, you know, do the best you can.)
Bizarrely, it turns out that the world around me is completely sterile. You may have mites in your eyebrows, bacteria in your spit, and God knows what in your tap water, but I do not. Even scraping the bottom of my shoe and putting the results under a slide turned up nothing but nice clean dirt.

who knew?
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(no subject) [Jan. 13th, 2009|04:35 pm]
Hello, darlings. I'm playing with Dragon 10, which seems to be much better than Dragon nine. Today's theme is-inching our way onto the web.
I bought a pair of board shorts from target using dictation software, I've managed to read the news, I utterly failed to be able to log into Facebook, and here I am, talking to you.

I'm so out of the habit of journaling it's hard to figure out how to talk to you. What should I say?
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(no subject) [Jun. 18th, 2008|02:02 pm]
Hi gang,
so you may be wondering wh why I disappeared so utterly off the web. Well, to make a long story short, I've damaged the nerves in my elbows. This has banned me from typing. Recently, I went to visit the doctor, and he told me that he thought the damage was probably permanent.


So I spent a night having hysterics, and then I got over it. I'm posting this via voice recognition software, and a touch pad mouse I'm using with my feet. Because if this damage is permanent-if this is just how it is-then it's time for me to start thinking about ways to adapt. I want back on the Web. I miss you guys. So this post may be the last one for a long while- or the first of many. We'll see.
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(no subject) [Jun. 27th, 2007|02:56 pm]
All this time I have been peacefully identifying as Generation X. But no. It's official. We are Gen Y, my contemporary blossoms; American Demographics says so. Brush off your baby-dolls and smile.
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(no subject) [Jun. 26th, 2007|11:06 am]
Well. I am becoming decrepit, children. I have a phlegmy cough, a bad attitude, and only one hand that works.

But. It's summer in new york. Hot, sticky, and concrete, my favorite season. In honor of the first day above 90 degrees, I present to you my favorite-ever Poetry In Motion poem. (It took me years to track it down--it wasn't anthologized, and it hasn't been frequently translated, apparently. To my knowledge it has only been published in one book, which was presented to me on the Occasion of my Birthday this year. )

Too Much Heat, Too Much Work

It’s the fourteenth of August, and I’m too hot
To endure food, or bed. Steam and the fear of scorpions
Keep me awake. I’m told the heat won't fade with Autumn.

Swarms of flies arrive. I’m roped into my clothes.
In another moment I’ll scream down the office
As the paper mountains rise higher on my desk.

O those real mountains to the south of here!
I gaze at the ravines kept cool by pines.
If I could walk on ice, with my feet bare!

Tu Fu (712-770)
Translated from the Chinese by Carolyn Kizer

That's where we're going, darlings. And, truly, I'm looking forward to it.
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(no subject) [Jun. 20th, 2007|02:53 pm]
So. About 20 minutes ago, I got a call from the receptionist, who hung up on me. I wondered about this, vaguely, and--I was about to write "went back to work" but "went back to accidentally reading Confederacy of Dunces on Google Books" would, regrettably, be more accurate.

Maybe 45 seconds later, I was startled by a huge green thing in my peripheral vision. It turned out to be the receptionist, totally hidden behind a 1-800-Flowers object the size of her torso, which she dropped on my desk.

I was surprised. In fact, I was so surprised that I stared at her and demanded, "What the hell is this about?" Which is not a nice thing to say to people bringing you flowers, generally, and I'm resolved not to do it again.

I have an Admirer.
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(no subject) [Jun. 19th, 2007|12:23 pm]
(though, for the record, it ain't my personal manifesto. )
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(no subject) [Jun. 19th, 2007|12:20 pm]
"Another problem is the idea you may have that sexual orientation is something static that cannot change. For this reason, you picture the bisexual sitting in front of a mirror getting ready to go out and saying to him/herself, "What do you think--the gay hat, or the straight hat, this evening?" and you think to yourself, "That's not right. You oughta pick one hat and have it bolted to your head." And then you think, "OK, the hat metaphor's not working for me, clearly, but isn't it a little weird not to be able to make up your mind? I bet these people take forever to order in restaurants."

I'm so amused by this person!
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(no subject) [May. 30th, 2007|11:31 pm]
Well, darlings. I'm in London. And I've just remembered that actually I generally get humiliated in London, so this time I'm going to behave myself. Specifically, I'm going to behave myself like an American, not a baffled hybrid.

I'm worn out--stayed up all night last night, and when I say all night, I *mean* all night. Couldn't sleep at all. I read seven short novels, I think, and ate pasta at 4:30 AM. Odd thing for me to do, but there you are.

Tomorrow I go to the office. Wish me luck.
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